The Espenblog

"You never know what may come forth from this simple-minded man!"

Welcome

Written By: George Espenlaub

I have gone out to find myself. If I come back before I return, please keep me here until I get back.

You have arrived at “The Espenblog,” and I guess you either came here intentionally, which we are glad you did, or you just happened to stumble in. If you just stumbled in, we want you to stay.

In either case it doesn’t matter how you got here, the important thing is that you are here. At “The Espenblog” our main purpose is to make you as batty as we are. Let it be known we are very capable of accomplishing our mission. None of us knows what is going to happen next so you’ll want to drop in often and see what is going on. Neither I nor the staff of this publication apologizes for being so dingy. The views and opinions of this publication are those expressed solely by the authors and staff of “The Espenblog.” We take full responsibility for our actions and our words.

As you view this page you will see the pictures of the staff here at “The Espenblog Times.” I’ll introduce them to you, and tell you what each of their functions are for this publication.

We have the fluffy dog girl, which is Fluff, and she writes all articles found in “Fluff’s Corner.” She takes great pride in her writings. She loves it when people leave her comments. Fluff would try to convince you that she is the only sane one of the group, but she isn’t. She is just as twisted as the rest of us. Ms Fluff has had a long on-going feud with Harvey since the day he arrived. Those two are always badgering at each other. She writes about anything and everything. Update: Ms Fluff Dog passed away in April of 2011. We have kept her writings posted in tribute to her. She is sadly missed by all.

There is Harvey, the GM of George’s Gorilla’s Fantasy Football Team, and he author’s the section entitled “From the Desk of Harvey.” Harvey is a real character to say the least. Some of the situations he gets himself into is unbelievable. He’s a much needed fixture around here nonetheless.

He sure has made some drastic changes to himself since the last time our readers saw him. None of us here at “The Espenblog,” were anticipating such a thing from Harvey, albeit that is typical Harvey. He always seems to do the most radical things and it usually takes everyone by surprise. Although he looks quite different from the last time you saw him, he’s still the same arrogant, conceited, self-centered, and dingy monkey that he has always been. Harvey always thinks he’s more intelligent than everyone else and he walks with his nose stuck up in the air like he’s so much better than the rest of us, but that’s our Harvey.

Ms Ernestine is the beautiful, most talented, gifted, and famous reporter of all. She is known the world over for her years of covering events both large, and small. She has been to every nook, and cranny on this planet. We are thrilled that she is here covering “The Crumbpacker’s Fantasy Football League.” She writes, “Ms Ernestine Reports,” and she is in no way limited to just covering football. Ms Ernestine will be writing and reporting on a multitude of subjects and she may just throw in some of her favorite recipes for you ladies.

Although Ms Ernestine was raised on a farm in a far away place she is the most sophisticated sow you will ever meet. She had a desire to become an extraordinary journalist from an early age. She was determined that she would pull herself up from her dismal life in the pigpen. Ms Ernestine wasn’t going to end up in a butcher’s shop hanging on a hook as a ham, or become bacon and sausage on someone’s breakfast plate. With help from her family, friends, and even the farmer his self, she rose up, applied herself, and became what she is today; A very classy lady.

Ernie, as she is called by the staff, is an all the time Sumo Wrestling Champion of the World. I didn’t say an all time champion; she’s an all the time champion because she has never been defeated. Ms Ernestine continues to defend her title against all on-comers but no one has been able to wrest the title from her. Have no fear when Ms Ernestine is around.

Last, but not least, there is Charlie, the weiner dog. Young, daring and mischievious, Charlie was schooled by Ms Fluffy dog before she passed away. He too has a problem with Harvey which can lead to some difficult situations. When their two big egos clash there will always be trouble. Charlie is the announcer and co-host for The George Espenlaub Radio Show that airs Mon.-Fri. at 6:30 p.m. ET. live from the Funny Farm. Harvey thinks since he’s been here longer he should be the announcer and co-host. It’s a never ending battle between the two.

Our goal is two-fold: We want to put a smile on your face and make you just as crazy as the rest of us. We suggest that you come here often, bring a friend, leave some comments, and listen to our radio show. There’s plenty to see while you listen to the show right from this site so kick back, turn the volume up, and read what’s happening around here. Thanks for coming!

Hey, there’s no need to dress up when you come here. We’re very casual around here to say the least but if you want to shine yourself up go ahead. Whatever floats your boat is fine with us……we just want you to be here with us.

 

2 Comments

  1. Kimberly says:

    Glad to find you again! 🙂

    • George Espenlaub says:

      Thanks Kimberly, it’s good to hear from you. Ms Ernestine is something for sure. Harvey has a new look too but he’s still a meathead.

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